Meat Broth...Yummy!

I’m reading the G.A.P.S book (Gut and Psychology Syndrome) and I reached a part where she printed a letter from a mom who recovered her son after two years on the SCD (specific carbohydrate diet) diet. It got me thinking of a boy I saw today in Starbucks who was 4 or 5. He was with his mom just waiting in line being curious as boys will…but mellow. He had his chocolate milk…his mom tells him to eat one of the samples…a raspberry scone. I watched this kid mesmerized…carefully placing his drink on the counter to be paid for…taking the scone gently and eating it with equal parts of curiosity and delight. I thought of Griffen and how he could not even tolerate being in the room let alone eating all that sugar, dairy, and wheat. I used to take him to Starbucks/Barnes and Noble and he would run up and down the isles giggling and screaming for the whole time we were there. So I’m watching this kid and I start to feel sad for what I’m missing…what my son is missing. But I read this letter from this mom tonight and I again felt real hope with the path we are on. I am starting to allow myself to envision having a moment like I saw today in Starbucks with my son more and more. I thought about Griff and I jumping in the car to go somewhere…the sun is shining ….we’re laughing and talking…talking!...we’re playing music on the stereo….that would be amazing.
I write that but I have to say we have amazing moment’s everyday. I love being around him…. he is so happy, warm, loving, curious, and strong. I feel like I am now struggling to keep up with his potential…that may never change and I guess I hope it doesn’t but I long for the day when he can escape the bubble. Son Rise and the GAPS diet will help get us there. Before I could not absorb the info on GAPS despite all the work we have done with diet…too much other stuff to deal with. It’s a challenge to be sure especially on top of Son Rise. I am looking forward to it though because the more I read the more I understand both the complexity and the simplicity of the relation between the gut and the brain. For me the struggle is the greatest when I don’t fully understand what I’m trying to accomplish…but a shift in perspective…a subtle change in a phrase or delivery and the whole world can open up and then it’s no longer a struggle but a joy. I find I am very aware of the constant shift between that which I understand and that which I struggle with…That will never change but my understanding and attitude towards the process can heighten my overall happiness in the experience. I can dig that.
I am challenging myself again and it is empowering and I have to remember to do this for my boy everyday…to remind myself of the strength it gives and in turn can give him. It has been hard to find my way in challenging him because the outcome….the goal ….the future is elusive and unclear and that may be my problem right there. It will always be unclear and uncertain. I’m still holding on to an outcome…whether it’s riding in a car together or him going to school I am still looking to a future I can not possibly know for happiness instead of consistently living in the moment. It is now that things happen…that growth occurs not in the future. I experience it when I write, when I read, when I accomplish something…it happens in the moment and is invigorating and I need to remind myself of that everyday with him….our interactions will affect change now and from that we continually build and the future will reveal itself.